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This is a Post About Sex and Not-Sex

I like being called Sir, but not Daddy. I love it when A opens the door to his apartment and he's wearing fishnets under his cut offs. I liked falling asleep with him the other night. It's been years since I fell asleep with anyone. I was glad to go home to my own bed.

I like getting sexts from M. Even when they come when I'm walking around running errands and I have to find a bench to sit on because my legs go weak. I love his dominate nature because I know I'm still in charge of everything that happens. I am in total control. I like checking things off my sex bucket list. The Fuck-It List.

I liked hooking up with R and then he returned to the West Coast but we communicate daily anyway. I love having a solo poly friend in my life. When he mentions his partners, I don't feel jealous; I feel happy that he is getting his needs met. I appreciate that he also felt that we had an emotional connection that went beyond a random hook-up. I think we saw ourselves in each other.

I love having my needs met, especially when that need is just being spooned in bed in a platonic relationship that is at least a decade old. Being able to message J after a bad date and being received into a safe space.

I'm learning more about my attachment style (avoidant dismissive) and it doesn't sound good. I googled it right away and it was all about how to fix myself. I often refer to the little note in my phone that reads 'connection feels unsafe' - it's true. Connection is unsafe. How many times have I been disappointed by people in my life? How many times have I set boundaries only to have someone crash thru them?

I read that the best thing I can do is find a partner with a secure attachment style. But maybe I am my own best partner and maybe this attachment style is just going to protect me from engaging with any more people who have the potential to hurt me

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